“Where’d you park the sleigh?”

Disclaimer

The Santa Blog is written by Dave, not Santa. It is designed to be fun, humorous, and informational. It is not written in character and not for “true believers.”

This is always fun as Mr. C:

“Are you the real Santa?”

“Where are your reindeer?”

“Did you bring the sleigh?”

The simple answer is “yes!” Of course I am the real Santa. But when you’re in the chair, the answer to those questions can be a lot more nuanced. There’s a lot of reasons a child might ask that question, I’m trying to answer their real question. Depending on the situation, I might not have enough time to determine what the question they are asking is. There’s a lot the child is trying to ask with the simple “are you real?”

Once again, I have to step back and rely on personal experience. While I have no little ones of my own, I have plenty of nieces and nephews. Each one has their own experience with “Santa Uncle Dave.” My niece and nephew were the first, quite literally, to meet Santa Dave. They were 7mo & 2.5 at the time and volunteered to be my “test subjects” before my first season.

My nephew was young enough that for him I sort of became Santa. Hence, “Uncle Santa Dave.” We think he knows I’m not the Santa that brings him gifts, but at the same time he did point at a picture of his mom with Santa when she was young and ask if that was me. So for him, at least for now, I am Santa.

Fast forward a bit with my other niece, who will be 9 this year. The average age kids stop believing in Santa is around 8, give or take. She’s sharp as a tack and we didn’t want to risk accidental disclosure with her. Especially when she was right on the edge of that discovery age. She has never met Uncle Santa Dave, and we try not to discuss any of those exploits with her around. She was already starting to notice some Santas look different than others. We were even warned at Thanksgiving when I showed up with my own white beard that there might be some questions.

So we prepped some mitigation efforts, like a letter I got from Santa telling me the rules of representing him. Thankfully we haven’t ruined it yet.

Then this past season I got an email about attending a Christmas party of seven-year-olds who had started hearing some rumblings on the school bus about the status of old St. Nick. This was a new field of questions.

“What’s my name?”

“Can you do magic?”

“Where’s the sleigh?”

For this one, Santa needed to take some improv classes... these kids were on a mission. Some we were able to sway back into a little bit more belief. Some… maybe not so much.

So we had three different sets of kiddos all asking what seems like the same question: “Are you real?” but really asking three completely different questions.

The first is asking from a place of joy. They know I’m Uncle Dave, but am I also actually Santa? Am I coming to their house Christmas Eve?

The second is asking if I am the Santa. The real one. They’ve seen different Santas and some of them are off. There’s a sense of skepticism, but still belief. There’s a Santa… but I’m probably just pretending.

The last group is asking if there even is a Santa at all. They want me to break and reveal something that confirms their already strong suspicions.

And those are just three examples. There’s a myriad more, and that is why I try my best to understand where they are coming from with their questions. The easy way out is to say “Yes!” and move along. But some times you have to give these kids credit. They’re smart and I need to meet them where they are.

For the last group that’s already trying to get me to show my cards, I try to give them as much real as possible. They ask if I can do magic. I told them only at Christmas. Are you the real Santa? Well me, of course I am that’s why I came to your house. The one you saw at the mall. He helps. I can’t be in multiple places at once. Did you bring the sleigh? Nope, I flew into JFK airport, and my rental GMC is parked out front. (If you would like to donate to the Santa-mobile fund, I wear a size red Jeep Gladiator)

But for the young ones, this candy cane is a direct one way line to the North Pole. Of course I’m THE Santa. And I’m parking the GMC as far away as I can. I don’t drive fully suited up. For them, I took the sleigh. (Or the Santa motorbike sleigh)

What does this all mean for you, dear reader?

Well, the simple thing is know your kids. Know where they are in their Santa journey. I’ve seen some of those blogs that will tell you you shouldn’t lie to your kids about Santa in the first place. I’m not going to tell you to do that. I’d be out of work.

But make sure you prep your Santa for where they are. If you can give the guy in red a heads up, even better. And prep your kids for what they want out of Santa. If they’re on the cusp, them walking up to me with the “it’s ok, I know you’re not the real Santa makes the visit better for all.

I knew what I was walking into with those seven-year-olds. I had a list of names. The parents prepped me enough. I can’t imagine what it would have been like if they hadn’t. I would be absolutely devastated if I caused the end of the belief.

Every child is going to come to the realization at some point. But I’ll do my best to keep that from being caused by an event with me.

And when they do, just remember:

Everyone can be Santa Claus.

By embodying a spirit of giving and kindness, Santa stays very real.